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Thursday, September 29, 2011

AMUSEMENT


AMUSEMENT
2008
Directed by John Simpson
Written by Jake Wade Wall
Starring Katheryn Winnick, Laura Breckenridge and Jessica Lucas
Not really. Is it supposed to be?

WHA’ HAPPENED?
Well, three things happened, really. This is an anthology film based on three separate urban legends. One involves a young couple driving into a dark forest because a stranger told them to take a short cut. The second involves a babysitter getting stalked by a killer in a clown costume. And the third involves a girl getting sewn inside a bed at the world's creepiest bed and breakfast. They all involve the same killer, a giggling lunatic who was teased by our three main characters in elementary school. One girl gets away and explains the moral of the movie in the most pointless narration possible. I guess we all learned something, then.

WHAT YOU SAY?
"It’s funny, right?"

ISN’T THAT SPECIAL?
I have never heard about this movie. Ive never known anyone who has seen this movie. But it has been recommended to me by Netflix over and over again for the past year. Apparently, it really wanted me to see this film. So I finally clicked on the goofy clown face (MST3K reference).


BLOOD AND GUTS:
Yes, there are death scenes. And yes, they are extremely elaborate and impossible. Case in point, this Victrola kills someone:


SHIRTS AND SKINS:
There are a few scantily clad women running around in their bras and panties. That goes with the territory. On the male side, though? Nothin’. There is the giggling killer, of course. Hes not exactly a rugged fellow (though his IMDb photo makes him look pretty handsome). And the two boyfriends don’t really get an opportunities to shine… or go around shirtless. It’s a missed opportunity, if you ask me.


RANDOM THOUGHTS:
Urban Legend is one of my all-time favorite guilty pleasures. I love watching people get horribly murdered via urban legends. I also really like anthology films and wish they were more popular with the general public. Based on those criteria, I'd say this film would be right up my alley. And for the most part, it is. But there's also the stink of missed opportunities in every scene. It’s not nearly as awesome as it could’ve been.


OK. IS IT GAY?
Not even. If it dialed up the camp factor, then maybe. Lord knows the premise is campy enough. But as it is, this is a lukewarm hetero journey into cheap scares and minimal suspense. That said, I like the clown costume. It’s cute.

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